Homesick :(

I didn't think I'd ever have to post this in my blog...we've literally been on fast forward for the past several weeks, that I really hadn't had the time to really let it all sink in. So Sat morning, we are driving around running errands and I start to get choked up. I mean really emotional and I feel silly since the kids are happy and so is Daryl. I'm sitting there thinking, "Okay, I'm done with my vacation and ready to go home and go back to my life". You know the feeling you get towards the end of any vacation where you know you are just ready to get back to reality. Well that reality is this reality and it never really hit me until a few days ago. It helps to have a Facebook and a cell phone to stay connected, but it's really not the same. I really miss my gym classes, my friends, the ability to just send my kids outside to burn off energy (in a fenced backyard) without worrying about whether or not a mountain lion is going to eat them since there is no fence here, being able to meet friends at the drop of a hat for a pizza play date, the e-vites to birthday parties or GNO that I will have to miss due to us being 2 1/2 hrs away and I miss the kids having their own rooms and their own space which everyone really needs. I worry whether or not I will be a good student or not or whether I will pass my classes and really fulfill my dream of becoming an RN. I miss my house and my things. My house is still there (it's being rented), but our things are gone. We do have Tatum's bedroom set in storage since it was our first set and a few other small things. But as far as couches, tables, tv's...all gone thanks to craigslist. Tatum even told me the day after my meltdown that she missed playing in her room and all of her other toys that I gave away since I had no choice (we just don't have the space). Her play area is literally next to my bed. We are living in a 700-800 sq ft area in the basement and are trying to make it "home", but it's still really an adjustment. The kids are doing well a few flights up sharing a room together. But it's still not the same since they just have beds up there and it's really not their bedroom.
And to top it all off, those people never contacted Daryl about the job that they supposedly wanted to hire him for. We still have a fund set aside for our van and house payment, so that won't be a problem. But still no fun! Our in-laws have been here the majority of the time we have been here so far which is great, but is hard because I feel like I need to keep a close eye on them at all times so they won't bother them (even though they told me they are fine), I just still naturally feel that way, so it just adds to it. I feel somewhat guilty for even posting this post, but it's only natural and I'm sure most of you would be feeling the same way. Yes, we are very blessed for this opportunity and it could have gotten pretty bad for us. We'll make it through and things are only going to keep going up from here and one day we'll look back at this time in our lives and just be so thankful for everything we have.